Dayna MacDen's son, Byron. (Jess Gould / XFM News)
An embrace of breaking down traditional definitions has changed what it means to be a family and a parent.
In shifting from the narrative of what is commonly pictured as a family, a growing trend of pet owners have titled themselves as parents to their fur babies.
Dayna MacDens is a post-secondary student and self-proclaimed Cat Mom to her black cat son Byron.
“I feed him, I look after him, I care for him. I trim his nails.. A lot of care goes into taking care of him.”
In taking on daily responsibilities to look after her cat, MacDens has faced pushback when calling herself a mom.
“The “Mom” thing I can kind of get some push back against. I don’t go through the trauma of birth, and I guess he’s a little bit lower maintenance than an actual child would be at least a little. I can ignore him for five hours if I’m busy, but you can’t really ignore a screaming toddler. But the idea that I am not a caretaker I think is a little silly.”
While many have argued utilizing the title of parent when it comes to household animals diminishes the role of a child’s parent, new mother Kassaundra Wlazlinski weighs in on the differences.
“It’s significantly more stressful being a parent, because I am responsible for making sure that my daughter becomes a functioning member of society. When she leaves, she needs to know how to accomplish things. It’s a lot more weight on your shoulders than just having to make sure my pets are happy. That’s a lot easier than making a person content and able to survive on their own.”
As a new mother, Wlazlinski has to ensure the choices she makes are beneficial for her daughter and family. “I’m not sitting here thinking what kind of school am I gonna put my dog into? I have to sit down and consider what does my child’s digital privacy mean? What is it going to mean to them in the future, and should I be posting photos of them? It’s just way more complex when you have a human being in front of you.”
The transition of what it means to be a parent and what is considered the foundation of a family, the norm is evolving quickly past taking care of a human. Not only the mother of a child, Beth Mink proudly cares for more than just her toddler at home.
Provided by Beth Mink
“I am the mother of an amazing three-and-a-half-year-old little girl, and I also am the mother of a 12-year-old cat and two little baby twin rats.”
In taking part as a parent beyond children, Mink hears the extremists’ views from only child parents and only pet parents.
“When it comes to parenting a living creature, every creature is different. Regardless of it being an animal or human. But my cat, she’s also been disabled for eight or nine years now. And I have to give her water with a baby bottle every single day. Every single time she wants to drink water. My child, she can drink water by herself just fine. So in any case, I would say that my cat is not more attentive than my child is, but is definitely requiring my full-time attention. I definitely think that there are people out there who give their pets a lot of love and attention and deserve to be called pet parents.
In addition to pets being the new kids, plants have now taken place as the family pet.
As the pandemic has led to many being stuck inside their homes, and may not be able to care for a child or animal, Wlazlinski notices the high amount of people taking in plants to care for as a new pet.
“I think that plants as pets, that kind of ties back into our need to nurture and take care of something and grow and blossom. With the economy the way it is, I can definitely see people that can’t afford a pet, but just some dirt and seeds and this little plant will fill that gap that I need to. It’s providing something. I definitely think that it can fill in that void that people have.”
To identify as a family and parent has reached out beyond the outline of traditions, but the message of taking care of each living creature with respect and love has remained universal.
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